BiG BuLLY

The other day, I was sitting at subway with Alyssa and her friend Priscilla. They had just got out of seminary and I asked them how it was. They said it was a good lesson and both continued to talk about class. They mentioned how their seminary teacher brought up Bullying. They went on to talk about how he said that 99% of parents pray each day that their child doesn't get bullied at school. 

How true this statement is! 

They asked me if I did the same. "Of course!", was my reply. 

I remember even when Alyssa was younger praying that she would grow to be accepted by her peers. Not thinking that she'd ever really have a problem, but based on even my own experiences I just never wanted or want her to. Lys has always been such a doll and so polite even from the age of two. But from a young age with her I feel as though I have tried over and over getting it into her head how important the golden rule is, "Treat others how you would like to be treated". I do the same to my boys but I will admit the older they are getting and how rambunctious they are, I haven't been as good as I need to be about preaching that over and over again. Boys, I think, struggle even more with this for some reason. 

I just watched Cyber Bully. Terribly sad movie. I cried. Mainly because as my daughter is getting older and almost a sophomore in High School,  the fear is so much stronger! There is a scene when the Mom of the daughter getting bullied approaches the father of the girl at school who was doing the online "social web sight" bullying. He defended his daughter claiming that whatever she was saying was her opinion and could be expressed freely under the 1st amendment. I cannot express the anger I experienced just watching this! Putting myself in this Mothers place. 

How many parents out there are the worst examples to their kids of this!? How many parents are pushing their kids to be "perfect"? And not accepting others imperfections. Whether its in sports, dance, academics... whom are not expressing the issue of the fact we are all so different! We all have different needs, different things we are good at.  If my child is off the charts smart.. why is he "weird"? 

Nothing upsets me more when perfection is pushed. When someone puts down another.  When someone makes you feel as if you aren't nor can be just as good as another person. 

ALL STEM FROM AN INSECURE HOUSEHOLD

(again in my opinion)

I grew up going to school trying to come across hard, like I didn't care what anyone thought. Are you kidding me?! I was so insecure about soo many things about myself that I put out attitude to just cover it all up. I remember days going to school HATING the fact if I saw "so and so" he'd probably make some rude comment to me about something I had wrong with me that day. Which is funny to me now, because when I notice myself becoming that "hard" person I have to take a step back and think about what on earth Im getting worked up over that really has no meaning, nor importance on my life enough to change ME or my security with myself. Especially when its coming from someone who is probably so insecure with themselves enough to take the time out to put it on me!

I was average!

I was not an overweight child struggling with eating.. I didn't have a handicap. And I remember feeling so terrible for some kids who did have these issues, who were picked on so much. The damage it did to me was enough, these poor kids who took the abuse. I cannot imagine. Or bear the thought of what their poor parents even went through with worry for their child.

The sad thing is that there are still grown adults bullying. Doing this damage.

My plea would be to stop it not only with yourself, if you are having even the mildest problem with this.. but instilling in your children how wrong this is.  

Speak well of others in front of your kids. Now, I am not perfect. I know this. I can find myself so frustrated with someone that I am venting about them while my kids are around.

We are all so different. Some of us can take it without a flinch, some of us are over sensitive.. and you never know what that person you might be "joking" with or thinking it doesn't matter with is feeling. 

One of the many things I have absolutely adored about my parents is their example of love for everyone. I have never heard my Father and Mother mutter a foul thing about a soul. Even when they have had the right. My Father only points out the good in anyone he meets. It amazes me. And on the daily, my desire is to acquire that attribute.

If nothing else, I am hoping I, myself, can remember to do these things.... 

ALWAYS. 

BE KIND. SPEAK KIND. BELIEVE KIND

-stop the bullying-

:)XoXo:)